One Month Old

I cannot believe it has already been a month. Time has flewn by. I can already see so many changes in Jackson, ans it's kind of bittersweet. As he gets older he gets funner, thats what everybody else tells me, but it means he is getting bigger and thats the sooner he will grow up. I dont know how anybody can let their children go. I love him so much I can never imagine leaving him, but i know i will have to some day. For now I am enjoying every minute with him. He has been sleeping really good at night as long as I feed him good. He is getting chubbier, and I love seeing him grow into his own little person. I love everything he does. Like when he poops he gets mad and cries, (probably cause it hurts) and the way he smiles as he nurses telling me I'm doing a good job, and he loves my milk. I love the he loves to snuggle, he would much rather be in somebodies arms then anything in the world, which is a bad habit that I cant help. I love his lips, they are so big and plump. I kiss them a lot even if he doesnt like it. I love the feeling of his toes and fingers, I touch and kiss them a lot. I love his "baby" smell that has become our smell now. i love the feelings I get when he smiles at me, even if he doesnt actually smile you can see it in his eyes that he is happy. I love the way he looks at new people, really looks at them. I love the way he looks at our Jesus picture with so much concentration. I know he knows who he is.

Being a mother has changed me. Made me more alert. I can hear the tiniest whimper, eve if I am dead asleep. He has made me a better person. I want to be the best person for him. I want to be a good role model, and a loving person and mother (not that I wasn't before) he just makes me realize it more. Even though I dont fix my hair anymore, and my attire is t-shirts and shorts nowadays, I dont care, and he doesnt care. He is the most amazing baby I have ever seen, he has changed me in ways nobody, or no thing has ever changed me or ever will. children are such a blessing and I am proud and so honored to be able to call this little guy my own.

James has been a huge factor this month. He has surpassed my expectations of a father. He is one the greatest fathers I have ever seen. Some dads can be scared of a crying baby, but at times James is better at calming Jackson down then I am. He holds him, and you can see the love pouring out. I am so grateful to have the privilege to call him my husband. i know as we expand our family he will only get better.

I am so thankful to our heavenly father for letting us have this sweet little spirit in our lives. He has blessed us in ways nobody will ever know. He is so amazing and i wouldn't ask for any other baby.

Lastly to Jackson I love you so much. This month has been very crazy. I have learned so many new things. together we have accomplished so many trials and climbed so many mountains. I love you so much, I cant describe how much I love you and what you mean to me. You are my world. You are the most amazing present I have ever received. I want to be the best mom I can be. I love you and would do anything for you.

I love you Jackson

xoxo Mommy